Strengthen the hands that are week and the knees that are feeble, and make straight paths for your feet, so that the limb that is lame may not be put out of joint, but rather be healed.
Pursue peace with all men and the sanctification without which no one will see the Lord.
See to it that no one comes short of the grace of God; that no root of bitterness springing up makes trouble, and by it many be defiled;
that there be no immoral or godless person like Esau, who sold his own birthright for a single meal. For you know that even afterwards, when he desired to inherit the blessing, he was rejected, for he found no place for repentance, though he sought for it with tears. (Hebrews 12: 12-17)
Jackie and I attended a large independent Charismatic church in Grand Rapids for about 7 years. The worship was consistently good as was the preaching, which always offered sound biblical teaching, laying a foundation for everything from finances to living a Spirit-filled life.
The pastor, apart from being spiritually gifted, was also a great communicator. We enjoyed our time there and I personally gained a lot from his teaching. However he did seem to cover what he thought important to share over a three year period. In our 4th year I realized that we had gone over this stuff before. Year 7 started round three and, although we left because one of our son-in-laws obtained a ministry position at a church back in Holland and we wanted to support him, 3 times hearing the same sermon is sometimes one too many.
One of the sermons Pastor Duane preached was on the root of bitterness. He had a favorite saying about being bitter and unforgiving and, whether it originated from him or someone else, it provides a wonderful and truth filled picture of their effects. I have used it a number of times myself to offer advice to people I have conducted driving tests for after hearing their sad stories.
"Being bitter or unforgiving is like drinking poison - and then expecting the other person to die".
All of us have been or have felt like we've been wronged or abused in some way by another. It might be as simple as a harsh word, an unloving comment or an actual or perceived snub, or it might be something much worse like having been sexually abused, injured or rejected by one we love. These things may happen to ourselves or to someone we love. Our natural human reaction is not to forgive and let it go but rather to hold on to it and to try to figure out someway that the other person can know or experience how much they have hurt us.
Thus bitterness establishes itself inside us and it will remain and grow and attract other bad spiritual feelings that go with it unless it and them are dealt with. One sad thing is that rarely does the offender realize how much pain they have inflicted on us. Our bitterness does not hurt them one iota.
A second sad thing is that although our bitterness does not hurt them it surely hurts us. Bitterness and unforgiveness are underlying causes of many physical as well as mental illnesses (read again the opening Scripture). And it is a prime entryway for attacks from evil spirits. Bitterness in fact is considered to be a spiritual principality that attracts other evil spirits. Consulars say that if you find one you will almost always find the others.
There is a progression of these spiritual strongholds, each one more serious than the other, that arise from the root of bitterness. Henry Wright in his book - A More Excellent Way - identifies seven evil spirits that are under and answer to the spirit of bitterness.
The first is Unforgivness and it produces a record of wrongs. Without forgiving we are diligent to hold onto this record.
The second is Resentment. This is when we keep going over and meditate upon the record of wrongs. Interestingly the byproduct of Bitterness, Unforgiveness and Resentment is Fear. It may manifest itself right away or much later but fears such as fear of man, fear of failure, fear of rejection and fear of abandonment often cause in us the desire to withdraw.
The third is Retaliation, which is finding ways to get back at the person who has wronged us. We want them to pay and by doing so then we can get even.
The fourth stronghold is Anger. Here let me say that I've seen the progression described by a women writer as follows: Bitterness leads to anger, anger leads to demands, then comes slander, then in an effort to justify our feelings we try to get others to agree with us, and finally that leads to the desire to harm our offender.
The fifth stronghold is Hatred. Hatred leads to the feeling that there is not room enough for both of us.
Hatred will then lead to Violence, which is the thought that the other person needs to experience the pain that we've felt and needs to know that they are hated.
This finally leads to Murder. Murder does not necessarily mean killing the other. It can also mean the attempt to destroy the other by verbal abuse or character assignation.
Just to repeat one point here. If we find in someone strong feelings of hatred, revenge, slander, violence, resentment and anger we almost certainly find bitterness and unforgiveness at the core.
The solution then is forgiveness. It says in Ephesians 4: 31-32
Let all bitterness and wrath (violence) and anger and clamor (making demands) and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other just as God in Christ Jesus has forgiven you.
Neil Anderson, who created the Freedom In Christ seminars through which many thousands have experienced relief from spiritual bondage, says that forgiveness is not merely forgetting the offense we have experienced. Forgiveness is a choice, a decision of our will.
This goes against our sense of what is right and wrong because we want revenge for the things that we have experienced. But God in Romans 12:19 tells that that we are never to take our own revenge. Never take your own revenge my beloved but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written "Vengeance is Mine, I will repay" says the Lord. And he describes it like this. If we never let the other person off the hook then we will always be "hooked" to that person. Until we let go of our anger and hatred the other person will still be hurting us. To be free we need to forgive the other person from our heart.
Anderson also says that forgiveness is agreeing to live with the consequences of another's sin. Since we are going to have to live with the consequences anyway our only choice is whether we will do so in the bondage of bitterness or in the freedom of forgiveness. "No one truly forgives without accepting and suffering the pain of another person's sin."
We think this is unfair and wonder where is the justice. But here is the wonderful news. This is exactly what Jesus has done for us on the cross. Unlike the sins of others against us, our own sins have eternal consequences. Yet without desiring for us to suffer for them, to hold these always against us, He took them upon Himself and bore the suffering and shame for us.
Anderson says that we can't wait until we feel like forgiving or we will never get there. Anderson says that forgiveness comes from the heart and that we need to ask God to bring the hurts and the pains out to the surface to be confessed or else our emotions will never be healed. And lastly Anderson says that forgiveness is choosing not to hold someone's sin against them anymore, to let go of the past and to put away any desires for revenge.
Forgiveness does not mean that we need to put up with future sin or the abuse of others We need to learn how to take a stand against sin while continuing to exercise grace and forgiveness toward those who are hurting us.
The second part of this post relates to the first in that I am constantly seeing outward expressions of bitterness, anger, hatred, resentment, unforgiveness and to listen to Madonna, the desire for violence, expressed throughout radical feminism. I say radical feminism because there are major areas that most of society will agree are universal. Those being equal opportunities for education, advancement, equal pay for equal work, dignity and respect.
Radical feminism however as an offshoot of Marxism carries with it in it's desire for "equality" a classless economic system as well as a sexually classless social system.
Marxism sought for the elimination of private property and to do that there needed to be a revolt of the underclasses to overthrow the oppressive classes at the top. The state then would control all means of production and distribute to all based, not on their merit, but on their need.
Radical feminism decided that society was also patriarchal in that men considered women and children to be property. To achieve a non-patriarchal society the state needed to make these things happen:
- Make divorce easy.
- All women should work outside the home.
- The state should provide free 24 hour day care.
- The state should provide free contraception.
- Births outside of marriage should be socially acceptable.
- Eliminate religion because religion promotes the family.
- Eliminate sexual classes and sexual differences.
- Seize control of reproduction.
- Women should be in control of their own bodies (a child in womb is not a real person, only part
of a woman's body).
These goals (and some much more radical) were established by the founders of radical feminism over 50 years ago and we all know how far they have advanced.
The root problem here spiritually is radical feminism's rejection of the Fatherhood of God. And here is where I see the conflict that many women are having who harbor bitterness and unforgiveness because they had fathers or husbands or boyfriends who did not properly love or support them, or they were abused sexually or emotionally, or were denied rights or treated unfairly because of their sex, or experienced rejection because of their looks or personalities, on and on and on.
The lie of the evil one is that he projects upon the Father and thus blames the Father for the hurts that others have done against us.
Here is a list that Anderson provides of the lies of the evil one and although they apply to all they also seem to speak directly to the hurts that most women have. He suggests to go over each one and then renounce those lies. Here is his list, each with a Scriptural reference that counters the lie.
I renounce that the Father is . . .
distant and disinterested (Psalm 139: 1-18)
insensitive and uncaring (Psalm 103: 8-14)
stern and demanding (Romans 15:7; Zephaniah 3:17)
passive and cold (Isaiah 40:11; Hosea 11: 3-4)
absent or too busy for me (Hebrews 13:5; Jeremiah 31:20)
never satisfied with what i do, impatient or angry (2 Peter 3:9; Exodus 34:6)
mean, cruel or abusive (Jeremiah 31:3, Psalm 18:2)
trying to take all the fun out of life (John 10:10; Romans 12: 1-2)
controlling or manipulative (Hebrews 4:15,16; Luke 15: 11-16
condemning or unforgiving (Psalm 130:1-4; Luke 15: 17-24)
nit-picking, exacting or perfectionistic (Romans 8: 28-29; Hebrews 12: 5-11)
God is His love and wisdom has a plan for each of our lives. Part of that plan is to provide forgiveness to us through what Jesus already did on the cross. Part of that plan is for us to freely worship and love the Father because He is good, and holy and worthy to be praised. Part of that plan is for us to live an overcoming life where we can be freed of the hurts and pains and the accusations that come from the world and the evil one. And part of that plan is for us to constantly seek Him, trust Him and to live our our lives in the order that he has established for us.
Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, what are immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions, envying, drunkenness, carousing and things like these.
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control (Galatians 5: 19-25)
No comments:
Post a Comment