Oh The Old Rugged Cross

 My life changed near the end of November, 1972.  Below is a re-post from my 2 Timothy 2:2 blog writing about it in November of 2006.

OH THE OLD RUGGED CROSS

I attended Catholic School from 2nd grade through 8th grade, and every morning would go directly from the school bus into church for morning mass, then from mass to my classroom. Everyday, whether I noticed it or not, there was a cross sitting on top of the church, a crucifix at the front of the church, a crucifix on a post carried by an altar boy (and sometimes I was that altar boy), and a crucifix at the front of every class room. At home we had a crucifix hanging in our hallway, and for a time my mother would gather her kids in front of the crucifix to say the rosary.

We had religious education daily, or if not daily then at least once a week. And when I went to the public high school I still had weekly CCD classes and Sunday Mass. It was while in high school that I started to question if God really existed. By the time I was in college, and I went to a Catholic college, I was convinced that God was a myth necessary because of mankind’s ultimate destination, death.

It wasn’t until after college and in my first year of marriage that we had a heated family argument at the Johnson dinner table about abortion, which somehow merged into religion (I was never going to argue religion). That night I told Jackie to lay her hands on me and pray that God would reveal Himself to me. I figured if there was a God who was intelligent and thus had a will for me then it would be stupid not to know what that will was. Intellectually I still couldn’t wrap my mind around God although I had spent many sleepless nights trying to. 

When Jackie prayed nothing seemed to happen. But over the next 6 weeks I began to get a lot of answers to questions I had, and saw the power of God move in really interesting ways. In fact, I began to believe that prayer would activate the power of God even if I personally still didn’t believe in God. And as I shared in the last post, one afternoon He led me to confess my sins and lay down my life before Him, and to step out in faith (without first seeing or feeling), and He became Light and Truth in my life.

It was the scripture from Luke 11 that reached out and grabbed me: "Ask and you shall receive; seek and you shall find; knock and it shall be opened to you. For whoever asks, receives; whoever seeks, finds; whoever knocks, is admitted. What father among you will give his son a snake if he asks for a fish, or hand him a scorpion if he asks for an egg? If you, with all your sins, know how to give your children good things, how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him."

Some years later I had a chance to go back into one of my grade school classrooms and talk to some 5th graders, and I noticed the crucifix on the wall. I realized that although I had always known that Jesus died for the sins of men and then rose from the dead, the connection never was made in my brain - Why was that necessary? And even, during those 6 weeks prior to my conversion when I read and began to understand the why, there still was another step. Faith doesn't bring knowledge of the Truth from the brain to the heart.  The Holy Spirit brings Truth to the heart, which then informs the brain.

Oh the old rugged cross.  Praise God!  He did it for my sin, He did it for me.

22A

My Dad once told me a story about a man named Frank who was sent to prison.  The first night after lights were out he heard someone yell out "87".  Laughter from all the inmates.  This was followed by a voice from another part of the prison block, "102".  Again more laughter, the process continued on for about an hour.  Every time someone would yell out a number the response would be either chuckling, giggles or uproarous laughter.

The next morning Frank asked his cell mate what the deal was.  "Prison rules say we are not allowed to talk after the cell block gets dark.  Well, there is a joke book in the prison library and all the jokes are numbered.  The guys memorize the jokes and then call them out after dark".  Wanting to fit in Frank spent all of his free time that day memorizing the book's contents.  When the lights darkened someone called out "10", which got laughter, and so forth.  Finally Frank screwed up his courage and loudly said, "42".  Silence.  "95".  Again silence.  "102".  You could have heard a pin drop.

The next morning Frank asked his cell mate why his numbers elicited silence.  "Well you know, some people just can't tell jokes".

I'm 61 and I've learned to live with people not getting my humor.  My first attempt was when I was about 5 and I was with my parents at the Russ drive-in.  After ordering a root beer float I asked my parents if they knew the difference between a boy elephant and a girl elephant.  My folks told me years later that they looked at each other and thought, Oh dear!  How are we going to explain the birds and the bees to a 5 year old using elephants?.  They finally said "How?" and I replied, "The girl elephant wears lipstick".  (note: Lipstick still works as a punchline).

Before that I was considered A VERY SERIOUS BOY.  It was the mistaking laughter of relief for the appreciation of word play that sent me on a different path, sometimes to my detriment.  An adult who sees humor in the often mundane commerce of everyday life can be considered NOT A VERY SERIOUS PERSON.  But - - - Sometimes I can't help myself.

A year ago I attended training to qualify for doing a certain type of driver evaluations.  The class was conducted by Dennis, a Canadian who, yes, was 10 times more knowledgeable about driving than I am.  In his class we learned that about the worst thing that could happen to a driver was to run into a 1500 lb moose.  It seems that moose are a big problem where Dennis is from, and every day we would get a moose example.

Dennis had two habits.  He would never acknowledge the validity of any answer given him when he asked a question, always finding a different way to express the same thing, and he would chuckle to himself while lecturing, which consisted of him reading off of an overhead the pages we had in the book in front of us.  Dennis was one of the main contributing authors of the book.

One day we came to the yellow section, page 22.  Dennis told us that page 22 did not fit entirely on the overhead and that the next overhead should be considered page 22A.  I piped up, "So the Canadian way of saying this should be, page 22, EH?".  Of course he didn't laugh.

I was talking to Becky on the phone yesterday and she told me that she was reading my post on left handed pencils from her cell phone while at work and was chortling out loud.  Her co-workers wanted to know what was so funny so she began reading them the post.  "Why would your dad put the pencils in two piles and tell anyone some are right handed and some left handed?" they asked, baffled.  To which Becky, not having experienced the years of bafflement her father has, responded, as only Becky can;  "BECAUSE THEY ARE 6TH GRADERS!"

Poor Becky.  She went to her first parent-teacher conference for Mello.  The teacher told her;  "Your daughter sometimes tells me jokes, and comments on mine".  "Well, that's nice" said Becky, use to it at home, to which the teacher responded, "She's three.  Three year olds don't tell jokes".   That's my granddaughter! 




 


 

Broken English

One of my favorite sisters, Char, came to town today with her youngest.  Mason wants to take up a career in aviation. WMU has the 3rd ranked program for that in the country and they came to check it out.  After a day of meetings, and seeing those "beautiful almost new airplanes" they seemed convinced that Western would be the best place.

This evening Jackie and I had a delightful dinner at Applebees with Char and Mason, and I remarked to Mason that I was counting on him to provide material for this blog.  As we were leaving Mason told me that he did a theatrical performance this summer.  "I stood on stage and told puns."  I asked him how it went and he replied; "Well, it was basically just a play on words."  Thanks Mason.

Earlier in the day I had a road test for a woman who was brought to us by and older guy named Manny.  This guy teaches driver ed for adults and is quite a character.  He used to teach high school in Grand Rapids and then did substitute teaching for 7 years after that.  One time, knowing that I would be substituting I asked Manny for any tips if I ever happened to sub in GR.  Manny grumbled; "I used to tell them first thing, I'm having a bad day. Don't mess with me, and that seemed to work."   OOOO K.

Anyway, Manny says that this girl needs someone to translate and so this other lady is going to help her.  I position the other lady next to me and begin.  She doesn't help at all when I ask the girl for documents and do the vehicle inspection, but then that part doesn't usually need much help.  Then I instruct the driver that during the part in the parking lot with the cones it will be a penalty each time the car hits a cone or crosses over any of the lines.  I look to the lady to translate and she says;  "Donn heet da cones or da line."

I then ask the lady what her country is and she tells me Liberia.  "Isn't English the official language in Liberia?" I ask. "It tis, only it'sa broken English."  OOOO K.

Light Affliction

 For momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison.  (2 Corinthians 4:17)




Several years ago I did a blog called 2 Timothy 2:2.  Here is one of my favorite postings.

It was the week before this Easter, as I was engaged in my daily reading of scripture, that I came across the above verse. Just before picking up my Bible I had read something in our local newspaper that caught my interest, and it must have still been banging around in my head enough to make it difficult to concentrate on the chapter from 2 Corinthians. When I read "light affliction" my first thoughts were - What type of difficulty does light cause someone? - When I get a faceful of sun it makes me sneeze. Is it like that? - Was there something called "light affliction" in Jesus day? - Do I need to check another translation to figure this out? I actually had to reread the paragraph a couple of times before the "light" went off in my brain. Several days later I went back and read chapters three, four and five to get the full context of Paul's argument. I also read chapters nineteen through thirty-four in Exodus to better understand the analogies that Paul was drawing from. Eventually I understood that, in both 2 Corinthians and Exodus, there is a type of "light affliction" that all mankind has in common, and that the resurrection of Christ, celebrated at Easter, provides us a promise of hope that one day we will be healed from it.

Two verses past 4:17 it says; For we know that if the earthly tent which is our house (our body) is torn down, we have a building from God (a better body), a house not made with hands, eternal in the heavens. For indeed in this house we groan, longing to be clothed with our dwelling from heaven. Inasmuch as we, having put it on, shall not be found naked. For indeed, while we are in this tent we groan, being burdened, because we do not want to be unclothed, but to be clothed, in order that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life.

Our assurance that Jesus actually rose from the dead, and that He will change our earthly tent into an eternal dwelling place with Him, is given to us by the Spirit. By faith we followed the leading of the Spirit and confessed that the death of Jesus on the cross was for us personally, both the punishment and the payment that The Father demanded because of our sins and our sinful nature. This faith allowed that same Spirit to bring Christ into our hearts, changing our spirit nature into a new creation. The Spirit can now dwell within us, and where the Spirit is there is light, a portion of the glory of God. But, although our body will one day be changed and we will be able to more fully abide in the glory of the Almighty, it is now still earthly. We struggle daily to overcome the carnal desires of both the body and the mind, and the tendency of all matter to breakdown over time. And like Paul, we may also endure trials from a fallen world that hates the light, and thus hates those in whom the light abides. It is a struggle to live a life in the light of Christ when the opposition comes from both without and within. We may often long to be released from the confines of our earthly body and soul, to be in the glorious presence of our God. But Paul tells us it is best to follow this simple advice. Our desire should be, both in this life and in the next  to be pleasing to Him. (2 Corinthians 5:9)

The book of Exodus tells the story of the Jewish people leaving their captivity in Egypt, and the journey to the land promised to them by God. On the first day of the third month they enter into the Sinai wilderness, and camp next to MT. Sinai. The awesome presence of Almight God is made known by the dark cloud and the flashing lightening at the top of the mountain, and later when the top of the mountain looks like it is on fire. When God speaks to the people His voice sounds like thunder. And the physical sights and sounds of God frighten the people. One of the things He tells them is that they are to honor Him alone, and are not to fashion idols. Later on He tells Moses, Aaron, Aaron's two oldest sons, and seventy of the elders of the people to advance up the mountain, although only Moses is allowed to come near to God. When they went up the group saw the God of Israel, and under His feet there appeared to be a pavement of sapphire, as clear as the sky itself". (Exodus 24:10) The group eat and drink before God, who then calls Moses to come into His presence. At this time the others descend the mountain and wait for Moses. Moses went up to the mountain, and the cloud covered the mountain. And the glory of the Lord rested on Mount Sinai, and the cloud covered it for six days; and on the seventh day He called to Moses from the midst of the cloud. And to the eyes of the sons of Israel the appearance of the glory of the Lord was like a consuming fire on the mountain top. And Moses was on the mountain forty days and forty nights. (Ex. 24: 15-18)

Some amazing things happen during those 40 days. On the top of the mountain God gives instructions to Moses concerning His laws, and shows Moses the patterns for the tabernacle, including the materials, the furniture, the priestly garments, and the things that the priest were to do. And God Himself writes down His laws (my sense is that this is much more that the 10 commandments) on tablets of stone for Moses to take back with him. But on the bottom of the mountain, even though there is still an obvious visible presence of the cloud and the fire on top of the mountain, the people grow restless. They forget about the pillar of cloud that was with them every day since they left Egypt, and the pillar of fire that was with them every night. They complain to Aaron whose tribe will become the priests for the nation. They begin to doubt that Moses is going to return, and they ask Aaron to make them an idol to be a god that they can worship. Now the people already knew the will of God concerning idols. Aaron and his sons and the seventy elders had seen God and had eaten before Him. For four months the nation had seen and heard the awesome power of God, had been instructed as to His plan for them, had entered into a covenant with Him. They knew all these things with their brain, but their hearts were still in darkness. They were worried about what to eat. They were worried about being left to die in the wilderness. And they were having an awful time trusting a God whose features they could not describe and who was making them wait. (And are we really much different?) So Aaron collects gold from them, throws it into a fire, and out of the fire is fashioned a golden calf. The people imitate the religious practices of the Egyptian people they had recently been delivered from, and rise up to sing, dance and cavort before a god made in the image of corruptible flesh.

Moses brought down with him from the mountain laws that God Himself inscribed upon stone. When Moses saw what the people were doing, already at the beginning rebelling against those very words the finger of God engraved, he smashed the stones. But the words inscribed on stone were never intended to bring life to the people. It was not God's plan to make a religion where people would be justified by doing everything that was written there. Following the letter of the law instead brought death. God's intent was to drive man to the tabernacle to make sacrifice for his sins, yet even here scripture says often that God took no pleasure in the blood of the animal sacrifices. Instead of works of religion God was looking for obedience because of the desire of the heart. It is the physical part of us, our body and our mind (the soul) that tries to be justified by works. But it is in the heart, the reborn spirt where the Spirit of God resides, that surrenders to God.

Exodus tells us that Moses set up a tent outside the camp, and when he would go into the tent the cloud would descend upon it and the glory of God would reside inside. He would talk to God there, and when he left the tent Moses would put a veil over his face, because the brightness of the glory of God that came onto his face, even though it would eventually fade, was too much for the people to look at. (Maybe the brightness made them sneeze) Paul says that if the ministry of death, in letters engraved on stones, came with glory, so that the sons of Israel could not look intently at the face of Moses, because of the glory of his face, fading as it was, how shall the ministry of the Spirit fail to be even more with glory? (2 Cor. 3: 7-8) 

The veil over the face of Moses is a reminder of the hardness of the heart of the sons of Israel in that day. and there remains a veil hiding the glory of God for them today, as well as for everyone else, until it is lifted by the Spirit when a person turns to the Lord. The god of this world has blinded the minds of the unbelieving, that they might not see the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God. (2 Cor. 4:4)

Trials and tribulations are a part of the lives of believers while we live on this planet in our earthly bodies. And one reason is because we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the surpassing greatness of the power may be of God and not from ourselves.  (2 Cor. 4:7) May we live our lives in the strength of the Spirit. And may the light of the Spirit and the truth of Christ shine into the lives of all those we know who struggle in this earthly realm.

 

Left Handed Pencils

Do you remember Middle School?  I sure don't.  Grades 2 thru 8 were spent at St. Francis de Sales.  Each year you got a little bit bigger and another year older but nothing much else changed.  Stayed in the same classroom, listened to the same teacher;  Mr. Zachem for 7th grade, Sister Mary Kenneth for 8th.

My Official Substitute Teacher Manual gives this helpful information under the title:  C.  Understanding Middle School students.  "This is another group that desires structure, but at times will outwardly seem to reject the boundaries.  These kids are a bundle of hormones at work.  Unfortunately, these hormones are not all working in the same direction at the same time."

In public school those hormones may cause students to question authority, make fun of other students and misbehave in the classroom.  Didn't quite work that way at St. Francis.  Everybody knew everybody else since before 1st communion and it was dangerous to disrespect your teacher.

One case in point.  In 8th grade my classmate Dave Fink, who was 6'2 at that point, got mad at 5'2" tall Sister Mary Kenneth and yelled his refusal to obey some request.  This made the good Sister mad.  She picked up a 1 foot ruler up from her desk and with black and white robes flowing began chasing the terrified Mr. Fink around the room.  This went on until Sister got too tired to continue.

Graduation from 8th grade was still not a promotion for us to High School.  At that time we had available E.E. Fell Junior High School, which enrolled grades 7, 8 and 9.  And that was a cultural shock. 350 kids to a grade instead of 40.  Physically 9th graders look at lot older than 7th graders.  At E.E. Fell  Gayle E. was a petite girl who was very well developed.  One day she had a "wardrobe malfunction" and she was half the woman she used to be.

I subbed at a Middle School for the first time this week.  The kids were great.  A little loud at times but great.  During a math class I saw a pile of pencils that the teacher had left on the desk for kids to borrow in case they forgot theirs.  I put the pencils in two groups and informed the 6th graders that one side was right handed pencils and the other was left handed, and please try not to confuse the two.

Immediately 10 hands go up, all asking the same earnest question.  "Mr. LaBarge, what's the difference between the two?"  I asked one if he was right handed or left handed.  "Right handed."  "Well there you go.  You can take a pencil from the right hand side."   When the questions persisted I offered;  "It's just the same as left and right handed screwdrivers and left and right handed hammers.  Really, not any difference."  That seemed to satisfy them.

They only problem I encountered was during a class period called "Advisory", which was like what we used to call "Study Hall".  The instructions were to let the 7th graders read or work on their homework and that they could go to the library if needed to get a book.   Each student at this school have little notebooks they carry with them that have to be initialed by the teacher if the kid wants to leave the classroom to go to the bathroom, library or office.

About a dozen lined up with their notebooks for the library but some also asked to go to the bathroom.  When the dust settled I realized that I had let about 6 girls go to the bathroom at the same time.  Normally I only let 1 at a time leave for the bathroom.  Not surprisingly, after 5 minutes none of the young ladies had returned.  I enlisted an eager girl to bring them the message that they had 60 seconds from now to get back.  All made it back within 30.  And I made it through the day unscathed.
 


  

"There's A Big Truck In The Garden!"

Jackie and I woke up this morning when we heard Helen, her 92 year old mother, yelling out from the bottom of the stairs;  "Bob, there's a big truck in the garden!"

Jackie hopped out of bed and ran to the window to see what was happening and I threw on my pants and shirt and hustled downstairs.  When I got there I saw Helen in her bedroom, dressed in a bathrobe, holding a cordless phone in her left hand and gesturing toward the window with her right hand.  "Look, do you see it?"

We both go to the window but nothing is out there.  Then we open the door to the back porch, but still nothing.  "Where did it go?" asks Helen.  We go to the living room and look out all the windows and I rush to the kitchen and dinning room to cover that side of the house.  All this time Helen is still clutching onto the cordless phone and I'm wondering what I am going to tell the police in case Helen dialed 911.

Finally, thinking it might have been people from Consumers Power or something I ask; "What kind of truck was it?"  Helen who does not have her hearing aids in cocks her head slightly to the right and says "What?"  Speaking louder this time I ask her what kind of truck was it.  "What?"  I ask again even louder;  "WHAT KIND OF TRUCK WAS IT?"

"Truck?  It wasn't a truck.  It was a big buck (spreading her arms far apart),  with antlers this big.  Jo Ann phoned me when she saw it out by the swing set.  Where did it go?"

I don't know where it went.  I went back upstairs to shower and dress.  It did remind me of the time we lived in the big house and my nephew Ryan, who was about 8 at the time, was playing downstairs.  His mother Joyce hears something, goes to the top of the stairs and yells;  "Ryan, watch your language!"  Ryan yells back;  "I said BUCK!"

 

11/11/11

"It is eleven days' journey from Horeb by the way of Mount Seir to Kadesh-barnea."  Deuteronomy 1:2

Horeb is also known as Mount Sinai and Kadesh-barnea is a place located just SW of Canaan, the land that God promised to give to the Jewish people.  Moses speaks to the people at Horeb and says;

"The Lord our God spoke to us at Horeb, saying 'You have stayed long enough at this mountain.  Turn and set your journey, and go . . . See, I have placed the land before you;  go in and possess the land which the Lord swore to give to your fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob, to them and their descendants after them.'"  Deuteronomy 1:6-8.

The Jewish people get to Kadesh-barnea but then are afraid to go further.  They come up with a plan to send 12 spies into the land.  Moses agrees to the plan and we know the rest.  Ten spies put more fear and doubt into the peoples hearts, and only Joshua and Caleb give encouragement.  Israel does not enter the promised land and now must wander 39 more years in the wilderness.  Because of their lack of faith God judges the people of Israel and no one (not even Moses) who was at Kadesh-barnea over the age of 20, except for Joshua and Caleb, are allowed to enter the land of God's promise.  On the eleventh day the people entered into unbelief and God judged them.

The number eleven is an interesting one in scripture.  11 is used 24 times, 11th 19 times, and 1100 twice.  The usual sense of the number in scripture is one of disorder, imperfection, judgement, and lack of faith.  Jacob had 12 sons who would become heads of the 12 tribes.  The brothers sold Joseph into slavery and for awhile there were only 11.  Jesus had 12 apostles but only 11 after Judas betrayed Him.  The apostles then choose a replacement to bring the total back to 12.  God gave Moses the 10 commandments.  If we were to add to what God has commanded we would then have an 11th.

To me the use of 1100 is even more interesting.  Both are found in the Book of Judges.

In chapter 16 we see that the five lords of the Philistines each give Delilah 1100 pieces of silver to betray Samson to them.  Samson is the mighty judge and deliverer of Israel, although quite a carnal man.  The Philistines were a major foe of Israel and lived along the coastal area of the Mediterranean Sea in a region we now call the Gaza strip.  Samson talks too much, reveals to Delilah that he has been dedicated as a Nazirite to God from his mother's womb. and that his strength is because of the length of his hair.  Delilah cuts Samson's hair, the Lord (the real source of Samson's strength) departs from Samson, and he is captured.

The next chapter relates the beginning of the history of idolatry associated with the tribe of Dan.

"Now there was a man of the hill country of Ephraim whose name was Micah.  He said to his mother, 'The eleven hundred pieces of silver which were taken from you, about which you uttered a curse in my hearing, behold, the silver is with me;  I took it.' "

Micah returns the 1100 pieces of silver to his mother and she dedicates the money to the Lord, but in a strange way.  She has Micah take 200 pieces to the local silversmith who makes them into a graven image and a molten image.  These become Micah's household idols.  Later on a man from the priestly tribe of Levi visits on a journey from Bethlehem in Judah and Micah hires him to live in his house and be his personal priest.

Around this same time the tribe of Dan, who were not able to secure their allotment of territory, were migrating through Ephraim, looking for land in which to settle.  They recognize Jonathan the Levite and ask him to inquire of God if they would be blessed if they settle at a certain area of land they were considering.  After Jonathan tells them what they want to hear they ask him to become the priest of their tribe and to take the household idols with him.  The tribe of Dan then settle in the area of Laish and do prosper for awhile.    However this results in two major problems.

The first is that this area becomes the main area of idol worship in the Jewish nation - "So they set up for themselves Micah's graven image which he had made, all the time that the house of God was at Shiloh."  Idol worship and unbelief are the main reasons the Jewish people undergo judgment from God again and again in scripture.  And this also leads to the tribe of Dan being omitted from the list of Jewish tribes found in Revelation chapter seven, 144,000  Jewish men from the 12 tribes who are sealed by God in the last days to perform a special service for Him. A tribe named after one of the sons of Joseph is substituted.

Does this mean anything for what might happen on 11/11/20011?  I don't know.  It might be one of those days where you check on events that happen in the world, i.e.  stock markets, Israel, earthquakes, storms, wars etc. and see if they may point to something else.  Unbelief?  Judgement?  Disorder?  If you put 1 and 1 together do you get 2, or do you get 11?

Do You Acutally Have To Die To Win The Darwin Award?

One of my clients for a road test today was 18 year old Phillip.  I get into his car and he informs me that he might have a problem with the steering wheel because 70% of his right hand and arm are severely burned and that he doesn't have any feeling in them.  "Do your best" I tell him and we go out for the drive.

"Did you need any skin grafts for your hand and arm?" I ask after a little while and Phillip tells me no, they are 2nd degree chemical burns and that the doctor says that he should start getting feeling in his nerves in a year or two.  "How did you get your burns?" I inquire, and thus began a most interesting conversation.

"My buddy and I were making smoke bombs out of black powder.  We put some powder into a jar and tossed it into the fire but after 4 minutes nothing happened, so I grabbed it out of the fire. There must have been a hole in the jar because the fire got to it and it exploded.  My hand and arm got burned and I had plastic shards stuck everywhere."

"Oh my!  It must have really hurt."  "Yeah, they gave me Vicodin.  They asked if I wanted morphine but I said no.  Then the doctor started working on me and I ripped the fabric off the arms of the chair."  "You didn't take the good stuff, huh?" I commented.  "No."

"Are you on any medications for it now?"  "No, not for that. I'm going to the doctor in 2 days to get some more meds for my neck and back."  "What happened?"  "Well, you know that curve on 68th street?  I was riding my moped and there was a pickup truck in front of me and both the front and the back brakes broke and I hit it broadside.  I flipped over 3 times and the handlebars of the moped folded in half."

Wanting to change the conversation to a lighter note I ask Phillip if he likes to hunt or fish.  He tells me he loves to hunt and has gone hunting in Colorado with his buddy twice.  "I bet that was fun" I say.  "Well, the last time I went my buddy shot me in the back of the head.  We spent the afternoon in the tent with him picking buckshot out of my skull."  I respond;  "Lucky he didn't have a slug in that shotgun."  "Yea, last year one of his friends shot him in his knee with a slug while deer hunting."

"You would think that after his experience your buddy would have been extra careful with a gun."   "Well, it was partially my fault.  I climbed up the tree."  (Don't ask, I didn't)

A minute later I ask Phillip if he has been in any other accidents.  "Yea, a few months ago my buddy and I were driving his car over to my garage to work on his brakes.  A car stopped in front of us, my buddy slammed on the brakes, but both brake cables broke and we rear ended it pretty good."  "Did you get injured?"  "I was leaning down looking at some CDs and I hit my forehead hard against the dash.  There was blood everywhere."  "Did you go to the hospital?"  "Nah, we went to my buddy's house and his dad gave me some stitches."  Seeing the puzzled look on my face Phillip adds;  "My buddy's dad is a doctor."

We get to 28th street near the end of the test and Phillip remarks that his church is nearby.  "What's the name of your church?"  "Good News Baptist Church."  "What's the good news at Good News Baptist Church?" I ask.  "What?"   "What do they tell you the good news is at your church?"   "Huh?"   "Good news, like Jesus died for your sins and you can be born again."  "I don't really know about that" says Phillip,  "I usually have to babysit my stepbrothers on Sunday.  They swear so much my Dad doesn't like to take them there."

We get back to the test site, I inform Phillip that he passed, and in his review I mention that for the most part his traffic checks were pretty good but sometimes he seems to lack focus. 

"Probably the Meds that I'm on.  They do that to me." 

Now he tells me.

Singing With Barney

For my gen ja generation, BARNEY evokes a slightly different image than for the current one.  Ours is not large and purple but thin and white.

Barney was the dot the i and cross the t deputy who was a counter point for the wise and caring Sheriff Andy Griffin.  Whereas the excitable Barney might want to incarcerate a jaywalker, Andy would find a way to make a positive life lesson for an escaped convict who somehow found himself in Mayberry.

A common point the mostly over 40 crowd heard during our training for Road Test Examiners was "Don't barney them", which to us meant that we were allowed to have a little grace when scoring those taking the automobile road test.  I shudder to think what that allusion might mean to a younger generation.  "Yes, you did stop on the freeway in front of a semi with air horns blaring,  I love you, you love me but we're not a hap py fam i ly',"

Yesterday I spent another day at Woods Edge Learning Center.  This time with 7 high school age students and me as one of 7 staff.  We began with a group activity.  The students have a lounge area in their classroom equipped with a large display screen hooked up to a special computer.  We began, as most classes I've been in here seem to, with looking at a calendar displayed on the screen to identify the current month and day, then switch to a site to check on today's weather.

After that we go to a program which has children books read by celebrities.  The reader would introduce themselves, then proceed with the story while the screen displayed the illustrations.  Our first treat was Betty White reading THE DIRTY DIRTY DOG, which must have been written when Betty was a child because, really, where do you find coal chutes into houses or coal mounds in rail road yards to play on today?

The next story, read by James Earl Jones, had rather abstract pictures describing the story of the black race from villages in Africa to slavery to Martin Luther King, using a theme of the sound of a drum.  Mostly silence from the uninterested kids.

Then the real treat began.  A BARNEY VIDEO!  I have never seen Barney except when flashing through channels on cable and now I'm watching it with high school aged kids.  The interesting thing with most autistic students is that you cannot really tell if they are actually watching anything displayed on the large screen.  But Barney brought out a chorus of sing along sounds.  Unintelligible but loud.

Tiffiny, whose usual MO is to talk or sing to herself all day, sometimes in a very high pitched baby girl voice, sometimes changing to a lower voice with a few words understandable such as "and a happy new year", was quite animated as well.  The others joined in with their "UMMS"  and "OOHS", and sitting behind them watching all of this I actually started chuckling to myself.  The combined sounds from the students were louder than the audio.  I'd think I'd be afraid to watch Barney by myself, but this was fun.